Don't Scream

     

    When people hear the word argument, they often think of raised voices, rolled eyes, and unresolved conflict. But most of this can be avoided if people learn argue responsibly and set some guidelines to prevent things from escalating. In an article written by Gary Layne Hatch,  he describes how arguments can be handled calmly and responsibly and gives tips on how to argue effectively. It is important to mention that Hatch states that there will always be differences, and it's what makes us unique and gives people a sense of identity (197). But, there is a line to be drawn, and it is important to make sure that you can uphold your own opinion and identity, but show respect and understanding to someone with an opposing view from yourself. 

    One of first and most important things Hatch points out is that it is ineffective to use force. This is meant for more of  a large scale argument, such as in government, but can also be applied to arguments between two people. When arguing with another person, you don't want the other person to feel forced into believing what you're saying, but rather that you have convinced them well enough to genuinely agree with what they're saying. Hatch states " Threats of force may cause people to change their opinions and actions, but they may do so grudgingly, resenting those who have threatened them. Negotiation and persuasion on the other hand, cause people to change their opinions willingly "(197).  This is very important to keep in mind. When arguing with others, it can be difficult when they don't see things your way, but resorting to any type of force will not be effective in the long run. It is much more effective to understand the other persons side and continue to inform them on your thoughts and opinions through persuasion. 

    Another one of the most important things to do while arguing is to keep an open mind. It is impossible for one person to be correct every single time they are arguing. This is why it is important to listen to what the other person is saying, and truly think and reflect on their ideas rather than spit out the first thing that comes to mind. If people enter an argument thinking that they won't learn, grow, or even change their mind, the argument is useless. You should enter every argument, and even conversation expecting to learn something. Hatch says "You may have already formed your opinion on an issue, but you should still try to find out what others have said" (199). Everyone should keep this in mind when arguing. It is important to look at the other side, not only to find flaws in their argument, but to also truly understand where they're coming from. 

    Lastly it is important to note that not all arguments may be solved, and you may have to "agree to disagree". This can be a solution, but both parties have to acknowledge what is happening. Hatch mentions that it's fine to do this, as long as you understand the consequences of leaving an argument at a stand still (196). Using this can be a solution, but may have negative outcomes in the future. 

    When arguing with others it is important to reason and be respectful. Arguments are inevitable, but can be handled with composure, which in the long run will benefit both parties. When arguing with someone else, remember to keep an open mind and respect the person with an opposing opinion.